This week’s lesson for our toddler

Has mainly comprised

Of ‘If you have done something wrong,

You must apologise’. 😇

…

Geezo, it is like pulling teeth,

And boy do they resist.

But they must learn, so guess what kiddo,

Mummy will insist. 🤨

..

I’ll ask a hundred times until that

‘Sorry’ I have heard,

And so it seems that sorry really

Is the hardest word. 😝

Could someone please invent something

That can make time stand still?

Before our wee one gets too big,

I really hope they will. 😕

…

Thank goodness we have videos

To capture all this stuff.

But sometimes it just feels as if

It’s never quite enough. 😩

…

When we’re old will we remember

Every single stage?

And what our precious child was like

At each and every age? 🤔

Our wee one has selective deafness.

Sometimes they can’t hear,

Especially if they are getting

A flea in their ear. 🤔

…

If they are doing something naughty,

They can blank me out,

And they will only register it

If I really shout. 😠

…

Sometimes though, I’m sure they’d hear

Me dropping a pin.

Their ears become bionic if I

Open the biscuit tin. 🤨

Why do kids make such a meal of

Getting their teeth brushed?

Every night it is a struggle,

But it is a must. 🤨

…

Mummy tries to make it fun.

She has a song she sings.

She’s made up a few verses with

Actions and everything. 😳

…

But no amount of coaxing works,

And pleading does no good.

No matter how hard Mummy tries,

Their lips are tightly glued. 😶

Today I started on my course.

I locked myself away,

And that’s where I stayed studying

For most of the day. 🤓

…

But I could still hear toddler playing,

And running about.

They were having loads of fun,

And I was missing out. 😩

…

You see, I have got used to all the

Time we’ve had to share,

And now when I don’t see them I will

Wish that I was there. 😕

Tomorrow I start my diploma,

And I cannot wait.

It’s going to take three days a week.

I’m back to spinning plates. 🤪

…

I’ve been getting used to all the

Time I’ve had to spare.

Once the course starts, I’ll not find

A minute anywhere. 😬

…

But I have missed the craziness,

So I say bring it on.

I’ll tell myself that when I get up

At the crack of dawn. 😴

Center Parcs is brilliant!

They’ve got the set up sussed.

If you have got children then

It really is a must. 😊

…

We bonded as a family.

Enjoyed some wholesome fun.

(I’m pretty sure the weather helped.

We had three days of sun). 😎

…

If you had told me years ago

That I’d be saying this,

I’m pretty sure I would have said

“Are you taking the piss?”. 😂

Packing stuff for going away.

What a bloody stress!

Forgetting stuff is not an option.

My brain’s in a mess. 🤯

…

Self catering at Centre Parcs

Means tonnes more stuff to bring,

Then factor in a toddler…we just

Need so many things! 😩

…

So I am running round the house

Like one who’s lost their mind.

I tell you, I will really need this

Weekend to unwind. 😎

For anybody planning kids

There are some things you’ll miss,

E.g. uninterrupted showers.

Oh my god, they’re bliss. ☺️

…

In fact, uninterrupted any-

-thing is very rare.

There’s not a minute of your time

That you’ll not have to share. 🙃

…

So make the most of any time

That you spend on your own,

As once your bundle comes along

You’ll never be alone. 🤗

Wow this is like olden times,

And it’s going to be great.

We’re off to a gig tonight.

I cannae bloody wait! 😃

…

Paul Simon is my favourite

And he has been for years.

I actually might pee a bit,

And oh there will be tears. 😍

…

Cheers to Granny and Grandad!

We could not thank you more.

I’m struggling to contain my glee

As I skip out the door. 😎